Taking the next step

I've reached that point, perhaps that age, where I'm ready for more commitment and more stability — I need a strongly typed programming language. I can't take these upstart untyped languages anymore, they're just too unpredictable! Their laissez-faire integer-or-string-or-object-or-whatever attitude was fine when I was younger, but now that I'm nearing 30, I feel I need something with more commitment, more stick-with-it-ness. Javascript, it's not you, it's me. I think we just need to be friends. I'm sorry.